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~ adventures in wonderland ~

Blame Game

May11

It was the hug.

I had wondered how he would react when I first entered his house.  Would it be obvious that he had missed me or would he just casually welcome me in?  We hadn’t seen one another for over three weeks.  I rang the doorbell, as I always do, even though I know the door is unlocked.  Then I was inside and there he was, tall and handsome wearing those awful glasses that hide his beautiful eyes.  Right away he opened his arms and — it was bliss.  He missed me.  A lot.  He pulled me close, closer…then closer still.  He kissed the top of my head.  I melted.  If I were a smart girl, I would have left right then, but as we all know, smart girls do not get themselves into such situations and therefore, I am most decidedly not a smart girl.

I didn’t hear from him all day.  Didn’t expect to really.  Our relationship has had its ups and downs, even in the short time we’ve been ‘together’.  I find myself wishing we could go back to how it was in the beginning with him anxious to see me every day.  But that won’t happen again.  I think he realizes that we went too deep, too fast but, like me, he can’t stay away.  I’d like to think that he’s in love with me too and it scares the hell out of him.  His therapist warned him against getting too serious with me.  “You’re not ready, it’s too soon.”  He’s told me that his feelings for me scare him but he’s never come out and said exactly what those feelings are.  Ah hell, who I am kidding?  It’s all just wishful thinking.

Then again, there was the hug.  That hug said, “I love you,” more than words ever could.

posted under Dating
176 Comments to

“Blame Game”

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